Fashion Portrait

Autumn Winter '22

twincrocs.gif
QUEENIEBROWNMAGAZINE.COM

for Today's Real Human BEING Extraordinary 

A friend and I were chatting on my front porch, relaxing and enjoying the hot summer weather. A couple approached, appearing to be discussing us. When they were close enough, the female called out, "I love your hair!"

I had my hair in twists, at the time, and received many compliments, so I replied "Thank you! I love twists!"

The fact that they froze in their tracks with awkward "Oh, Oh... what do we say, now?" expressions, made it was clear the compliment was not meant for me. I turned to my friend, taking note of her gorgeous, dark chocolate, face framed by her glorious, grey, mane and said. "She's talking to you, Sweets!" 

My friend, ever the modest, unassuming, individual seemed to wake from her reverie. "Me?" she asked in wonder.

"Yes, YOU!" I said nudging her. "She doesn't believe it when I tell her she is stunning." I said to the couple who were patiently awaiting her response. "Thank you for proving I am not lying because she is my friend." I added.

As if on cue, my friend replied,"Oh. Thank you!"

"You ARE stunning." The female stranger said. "I LOVE the colour of your hair. What colour is it?"

"Grey." My friend responded, matter of factly. 

For the second time, the couple looked perplexed. "You mean that is not a salon colour?" The male asked, sounding amazed. He must have been a hairdresser because, now, he looked impressed.

"Oh no!" My friend replied, springing to her feet." I refuse to poison my body with that junk!"

This was my cue to zone out because, as right as I believed she was on the topic of chemical toxicity and what we do to our bodies, I was glad that my friend was sharing her "Anti" toxins message with someone other than myself. I had heard her message before, several times! She was preaching to the choir when it came to preaching to me

The couple, on the other hand, seemed enthralled with her words. Like the goddess I believe she is, delivering a message to her masses, the couple listened with mouths agape. When she completed her spell, they seemed converted.

"I hadn't thought of that," the female said, turning to her male counterpart. "I am going to stop chemical treatments," she declared. Then she addressed me.

"How long have you been Natural?"

"About seven years - for the same reasons as my friend, here."

"Would you go back?" They asked in unison.

"How could I go back?" I said pointing to my friend and winking. "I'd never hear the end of it!"

My comment may have been tongue in cheek, but it is far easier to walk a path when the person beside you thinks similarly. My buddy and I are friends because we are passionate about the topic of clean living. She is more devoted - which is helpful because folks with BIGGER dreams tend to encourage greater growth. Surrounding oneself with people who dream bigger can be a humbling acknowledgement that "I am but a work in progress..." Healthy humility allows room to expand and grow! 

This issue of QBM is about sharing lessons that push us to expand our capacity for growth while celebrating that which we take for granted or hadn't considered celebrating - that which we still struggle to embrace. We are all friends here; the inspired, inspiring, the student teaching. We are sharing a message of accepting our perfectly imperfect selves while striving for the unimaginable. That is all we can do which - thank you, very much - IS enough!  

AGING!

There, we said it, you heard it. Now what?

You may be wondering why we are having this 
conversation, again? 
The answer would be, "It seems as though
it is necessary to have this conversation, again."

There is an opinion that the concept of aging today is very different from when our parents were young. 50 is the new 40, right - or is it the new 30?

Yes, the concept of grandparent is less that feeble, grey-haired, individual needing help out of the rocker, and more the Kickass Boss, sporting designer sunglasses while dashing off to the next adventure. But, has the concept of aging changed enough - for women, that is?  

Indeed, more and more 
women in the public eye are sporting their grey locks. Political leaders, celebrities, and, thanks to trendsetters like fashion designer Jean-Paul Gaultier who showcased models with grey beehives in his 2011 Autumn/Winter show, even young people are colouring their hair grey, silver and white. Older women are no longer hiding. The age gracefully sentiment is out the door - or is it?  

Women remain challenged when it comes to making choices. We seem determined to protect her, help her, (re)define her - bend her to our will - as we "correct" her decision of how she should be (ahem: Roe v Wade: Supreme Court ruling; the September 16th killing of Mahsa Amini). Even we who adore her, demonstrate distrust in her as we question her choice then oblige her with our opinion. It has not occurred to us that she has not requested our opinion. After all the injustices, inequalities, demonstrations, improvements we still render her, incapable, insisting that we decide what is best for her.  

Age is a remaining frontier where we are most dishonouring. We attempt to lock woman in a box labeled "Irrelevant" then expect her to stay there. Many are the examples of this, like individuals who decidedly only date women under 30, in spite of their own age - in spite of the fact that women of that age are barely entering their prime. Note Women Under 40: you have seen nothing, yet! 

Another example are employers that push staff approaching retirement from their employ via "Early Retirement" or "Early Exit Packages."
We know the equation: greater number of years served = increased salary + more expensive benefits. Employers cut costs by easing out mature staff while ushering in younger, eager (less costly) staff. Stats show women are more often the recipients of these offers. The National Bureau of Economic Research (NBER) . Take for instance the major National News network that "cancelled" one of their most accomplished news anchors because she allowed her hair to grey. Maybe the firing wasn't due to hair colour (considering her replacement has smattering of grey, himself). Maybe the removal was due to low ratings (Not!) and cost cutting measures (likely). Maybe the new News Head disliked "trouble makers." But, are those rumours true or just a shady way to sidestep management's  inappropriate behaviour? Even still,  should we label a woman "Trouble Maker" because she voices disagreement? Is she "toxic" because she is not nice or a veteran that suffers fools lightly? Depends upon perspective.

What does it say about organizations that discard staff after many years of service - essentially their female staff fifty-five and older? It hardly seems honourable

Whatever the example, whatever the reason, this is ageism in its most insidious form. 

Blue Theme Portrait

That said, what is there to do? 

Some would say, "Fight!"
Others say, "Age Gracefully. Go quietly into the night..."
But, there is a third option which
 is not a choice for many but an exciting alternative - to go forward, consciously and boldly.

We get it. Society remains convinced that women, particularly older women, have less to offer the world. We know much is the evidence disputing the rhetoric. What we may not acknowledge is that we, as individuals, are Society. Our personal judgements, scepticism, and presumptions perpetuate the stereotype. Also, as women, we may ignore that it is our fear, insecurity, our fatigue causing our submittance to the brainwashing. The Problem is not some Invisible System (of which we are a part), not The Media (we devour), not Hollywood (that we support) or The Government (we vote to represent us) but we, our selves, who either support the rhetoric or keep our opposing ideals silent. 

If it is defined as confidence, defiance or simply not caring what others think, change begins with us, as individuals. We are Change by deciding to conduct ourselves differently.

If we find ourselves asking a woman why (she is doing this or thinking that), maybe we can ask ourselves why we are asking. Why should she explain herself to us? Maybe we can leave her alone, and see how she impresses us.  


As women, how we respond to the writing on the wall, can command change. Taking that Early Retirement then embarking upon a new career path, is one example. In 2021, 49% of new businesses were started by women - up from 28% in 2019. More than half of those entrepreneurs were 40 to 55 years of age; the largest subgroup belonged to the African diaspora. Returning to past careers more confident, more daring, more poised than their days of youth is another example of changing the rules. Maybe, as the ousted News Anchor did, we can accept a position offered by a rival organization that recognizes our value.

Getting older has its challenges like every stage of life... the challenges of getting that very first job was discouraging at best when we were young, but we worked through it.

Embracing oneself, is less "Fighting" or "Giving In," and more deciding - daring - to change the story.
 Making this change is the only way to make a
difference. 

5 Questions with...

AdeHassanlinkedinimage.png

Ade Hassan.

Dubbed a trailblazer and an inspirational entrepreneur, accused of revolutionizing fashion, it is our pleasure to present "5 Questions" to a woman whose business we have been watching from its beginning. We plan to continue watching this Founder and CEO of NubianSkin, not just because we love her company maxim: Empowering women and embracing our colour, but also because we are excited to see what she does next. 

If you have not heard of Ade Hassan, much can be said about this dynamic 38 year old, and her eight short years in business. 

 

Most admirably is her complete pouring out of love for her parents: her father, the visionary; and her mother whose influence as she transitioned from stay-at-home-mom to entrepreneur building her own business was everything to Ade.

Ade has always known she wanted to be her own boss (like her mother). She also knew she wanted her business to be in fashion (as inspired by her Nigerian culture of custom tailoring). She just could not fathom in what capacity her desire could be born. Finally, "as if out of nowhere," in the midst of a brainstorming session with herself, a memory struck. The memory was of her exercise in futility trying to find a nude bra that matched her skin tone. Shaking in her Eureka! moment, this Master of Economics had found her mission.

 

Imagine creating something that many others wanted, needed, that no one dared to make or even considered making - and realizing you could be the one to it. Ade's  determined audacity was demonstrated in her dreaming, designing, researching, creating, experimenting (on colours to reproduce) then sourcing nude lingerie for those to whom nudes were unavailable!

As if to prove that her shopping disappointments were not in vain, in 2014, Ade received the Fashion Entrepreneur of the Year award, at the Great British Entrepreneur Awards. Then Nubian Skin was nominated for Hosiery Brand of the Year at the UK Lingerie Awards while Ade won Favourite British Designer of the Year, both in 2015. Her most shocking recognition brought her to tears. It was a letter from Her Majesty Services, appointing Ade as a Member of the Order of the British Empire in the 2017 Queen's Birthday Honours for services to fashion.

If recognition from her peers were not enough, another queen - Bey, that is - yep, Beyoncé (well her stylist) emailed Ade saying they wanted to work with her for The Formation World Tour. Ade was to provide lingerie for the back up dancers and the queen (Bey), herself.

 

Ade was on a rocket rise only a short while after launching her business in October 2014! Proving, thousands of women - and men - were awaiting this product from around the world.  

 

Since then this e-commerce shopping source gained admiration from other celebrities like Kerry Washington and Lizzo as well as a very loyal community base.. 

Always respecting the community that supported her from the moment her promotional "coming soon" photo was uploaded to instagram, Ade keeps her mother's words in mind when spectacular lows follow the wonderful highs in business: "Life will always have struggle." Ade reminds herself to take the "less shine" moments into appreciation as well as the "shine" times. She acknowledges those moments of self doubt but reminds herself that many lives have been changed due to her creations, and she has created a legacy of changing an industry by staying true to a childhood dream.

Just when you think there is nothing left for this previous private equity manager to do, this year she was asked to meet a need that (as she had discovered upon starting her business) suppliers would not meet. Ade was asked to cater to the staggering number of women not given prosthetics after mastectomies due to the lack of skin tone matches. Visualize going through one of the most traumatic experiences of your life, where an intimate part of your body is removed, only to see its replacement in a completely different colour from your body. Would that jarring impact assist with normalcy or add to the psychological stress of the survivor care journey?

This is where we, at queeniebrownmagazine.com, began buzzing with excitement. This inconceivable shift in industry, adding to her brand, forced us to contact Ade to see how she was doing.  Ade responded, immediately, and was sincere in her communication with us. We are very grateful to have had the opportunity! Here is what she said:

 

How are you feeling right now, with the word out on this new endeavour? How long have you been sitting on it before sharing?

I'm feeling really proud about it, and so happy for the positive impact it's going to have on the standard of care for women who need it.  I'm also a little anxious as I really want to be able to get it out to medical institutions and individuals as quickly as possible.  We've been actively working on this for over six months now, and the idea was first presented to me in February, so it's been for the better part of this year.

 

Please share how you increased the scope of product from body wear, to shoes to soft prosthetics, "Softies."

Most of the expansion of our product has been testing items that we think our customer might like.  With the softies, it was an instance where someone in a profession in a completely different field, said, "we have a need, and existing suppliers are refusing to meet it, can you help?"

 

Also include the conversation you had with Natalie Johnson as well as your reaction to it after the first contact.

Natalie approached me in February of this year, and she explained to me that she had numerous patients who were heart broken over their choice of softies' colour when they were already trying to recover from their treatment and surgery, and she really wanted to do something about it.  It wasn't an area we had every done anything in before, but I knew immediately that I wanted to help.  I have lost an aunt to breast cancer, and I have another aunt who has survived it, so it was personal.  The big issue was around funding, and several months later, Natalie was able to secure funding from the Royal Marsden Cancer Charity, and I remember telling the team what we would be working on, and everyone had tears in their eyes.  We knew how important it was.

 

How long was the process to actually develop the Softies?

We were able to turn it around very quickly because everyone involved was so determined to make it happen.  I'd say all in all we got it done in about 4-5 months.

 

Ade, the little girl that said she was going to be a business woman when she grew up, what would you say to her and other little (or big grown women) who share that dream?

Never stop believing in yourself, and remember that living your dream isn't always easy, but you can do it. 

Nubian Skin has developed, in partnership with The Royal Marsden NHS Foundation Trust, the UK's first softie covers to cater for women of colour. The pilot was funded by The Royal Marsden Cancer Charity. Olivia Howes, Oct 04, 22 nubianskin.com. To date, patients are reporting phenomenal feedback. Statements like " feeling included" and "cared for" are used by patients.

 

Kudos to Ade for meeting this need as well as Natalie Johnson, a Breast and Oncoplastic Surgeon at The Royal Marsden and Sarah Adomah, Lead Breast Clinical Nurse Specialist at the hospital, for listening to patients and responding to this call! 

By the way, you must check out this website as we found it soothing, practical, fun and cozy with everything available at the stroke of your fingertips. NubianSkin.comTell them "queeniebrown sent you" (not that you will receive special treatment, you're just inviting others to share in your community)!

AdeHassanNubianSkin
Nubianskin.photoshoot.insta
NubianSkinPhotoshoot.insta
Member of the Order of the British Empire. Honours services to fashion. ​
Member of the Order of the British Empire for services to fashion.
Member of the Order of the British Empire for services to fashion.
BeyonceinNubianSkinBra
Beyonce The Formation World Tour
adeHassan.insta.
Nubian Skin Breast Cancer Prosthesis - Skin Tone Softies
Natalie Johnson and Sarah Adomah,

Style is Fashion

If you have ever considered a fashion change or thought about adding a little umph to your wardrobe, this season promises motivating pieces to choose from...
Bras, bustiers, oversized jackets, Luxurious cozy coats atop slinky dresses or rushed skirts; oversized pants; minimalism at its best; leather, prints, studs, form-fitting/ flared, flowing, floor length tops. Items in multiple fusions of periwinkle blue, canary yellow, hot pinks, red, and of course black. All "Creating a beautiful clash of structured and fluid forms, composure and impulsion." 
Versace website. 
Masculines, we have remembered you, too. We present a glimpse of what Nigerian Designer, Kamsi TCharles has for sale that just might have YOUR name on it.

Enjoy!

Speaking of Toxins

My husband and I have regular "discussions" about what products enter our home

Products containing synthetics and chemicals are great sticking points as I am "sensitive" and he comes from a time when "The Best" products worked miracles but required masks and rubber gloves. If an item has great advertising, my husband "wants to try it." I, on the other hand, am weary of The Manipulation to just take our money. We debate over, results versus  poisoning ourselves - particularly as most products seldom equal their attractive packaging or advertising claims.

 

Ours is a constant battle ranging to everything on this page... I want you to know, I took ZERO pleasure presenting the following scientific claims to him!

harshcleaningproducts.png

Did you know that harsh cleaning products can wreak havoc on your physical as well as mental health? Not only can they - at the very least - irritate your skin, eyes, tummy and lungs, harsh chemicals could actually KILL your body's good bacteria as well as negatively affect how your genes regulate themselves. YIKES!

Much like choosing the foods you eat, it may be healthier to only purchase items with ingredients you can pronounce - or ingest!

BY THE WAY: Bleach is also on the list as a possible irritant as well as a dangerous toxin when mixed with acids - like drain cleaners. So, if you use bleach, be CAUTIOUS, and KEEP it far AWAY from children. 

The most frequent calls to Poison and Control are the accidental swallowing of bleach involving children under six years of age!

sponges.jpg

You have heard this one multiple times before. Sponges are bacteria... well... sponges! 

Repeatedly using the same sponge from task to task may very well be spreading bacteria from place to place in your home. The reason for this is  hundreds  of bacterias could exist in high concentrations  in one sponge. The scary part is, some of us assume microwaving is a great way to clean a sponge but it's been discovered that not all bacteria is killed by this method which can effectively lead to food poisoning. Phooey!

plasticcontainers.jpeg

Many of us have these in our cupboards because they are so convenient.

Due to their convenience, we ignore the fact that the contaminants we introduce into our bodies once they are leached into our foods from this container is not worth the price. These plastic containers break down - faster when heated - then the chemical particles they are composed of blend in with our food. Yummy... We may know to avoid the chemical compound Bisphenol A, unfortunately, it is becoming clear that claims of “BPA-free” products likely means BPS included, instead. BPS is akin to BPA with similar effects as it also mimics estrogen and has a negative effect on immunity as well as hormone regulation. These issues have been proven to directly affect fertility. https://www.foodmatters.com/article/5-reasons-to-avoid-plastic-containers  We  have not even discussed the potential increased risk of cancer and diabetes these chemicals may cause. As informed citizens, we must also list the negative impact this product may have on the planet from the time it is made to the time it is discarded and broken down... oh, oh... bottled water alert! Now what???? 

NOTE: box and can linings also remain a problem as they are often made with plastic. Glass bottles of pop, beers, food or baby bottles may be a better alternative. Does this mark the end of boxed wine?

empty-cardboard-boxes.jpg.webp

So, you have had a few deliveries or are saving these for the next boxed gift you will want to wrap. 

Have you considered the MANY stops that box has made before arriving at your door? What about the length of time that "new" box was sitting around in transit from overseas or across country, in a warehouse or facility far far less clean than your home? What do you think has visited that box you are saving for an unknown purpose? What creature made a home, relieved themselves - laid eggs! in said box: mice? spiders? cockroaches? OK. Forget critters for a moment. Consider how easily boxes absorb smells, chemicals, moisture. What builds after sitting around in damp conditions for a period of time? If you said mold, that is a good start. What is developing in the box corners, under flaps or beneath that tape? Nothing? Don't be too sure!

As for  What we Put on Our Bodies  the options aren't much better. Again, if you cannot pronounce the ingredients you probably should not purchase the product.

Mascara, for instance, can cause lash loss with daily wear!
College of Optometrists, U.K., found, chemicals can weaken the roots of your lashes and make them fall out, as can the continuous process of rubbing eyes while removing mascara—especially the waterproof brands. We have said this before, but did you know chemicals like: cheap petroleum distillates (used for even application), aluminium powder for colour, and parabens for preservation used in mascaras have been touted as dangerous for your health by the American Environmental Working Group. Apart from causing organ system toxicity and increased skin absorption, these chemicals have also been linked to breast cancer. Also, in a study published in the International Journal of Cosmetic Science, researchers found staph bacteria present in 79% of the mascara samples they tested. Why? Storing and pumping  the mascara wand that carries our eye secretions (ummm...) into that dark tube, makes it the perfect breeding ground for bacteria. Also, we all know that sharing mascara is bad, bad, bad, almost as bad as using it beyond its expiry date, but, did you also know, leaving your mascara out in the open can lead to bacteria spreading to your lashes and lids, and giving you an eye infection aka a stye? Oh, oh... research conducted at the Ohio State University indicated that the harmful chemicals in mascaras can also weaken your eyesight - if you don't accidentally poke and injure your eye, first! https://www.healthshots.com/beauty/skin-care/youll-want-to-break-up-with-your-mascara-after-reading-these-5-health-risks-of-using-the-cosmetic/

Shampoos & Conditioners - have you heard of formaldehyde releasing preservatives (formaldehyde releasors)? Well, manufacturers have; they use it to extend product shelf life. It may not do YOUR life any good as the chemical seeps into your head causing short as well as long term effects ranging from skin irritation- not that again! - to allergic reactions and cancer. Preservatives like methylchloroisothiazolinone (MCI),  methylisothiazolinone (MI), and iodopropynyl butylcarbamate (IPBC) are used to preserve (stop microbes growth - ya know, the multiples of bacteria). But, the National Library of Medicine showed, prolonged exposure to low levels of MI may have damaging consequences to the developing nervous system. EGADS, not the nervous system AGAIN! There are more chemicals to avoid on the list of ingredients, like fragrance, even. GOOGLE what you see on your packaging then decide for yourself if you want that rubbed on - then absorbed into - your precious body.

Moisturizers are much the same. CHECK THE LIST of  INGREDIENTS!  Even our most trusted Petroleum Jelly, you most surely have heard by now, is a petroleum by-product - it says it right there on the packaging - which can contain terrible toxic chemicals! Less, expensive and trusted Petroleums probably should be the last thing to apply to the lips and 
spread across your largest organ - the skin - regardless what your mother, grandmother and great grandmother told you. At the very least, Petroleum Jelly can aggravate acne or irritate skin. Slathering it on damp or dirty parts can lead to bacteria build up both on the body or petroleum containers! Petroleum jelly can  be poisonous if it gets into your eyes or if it is ingested.  You especially want to avoid getting Petroleum jelly into your breathing tube and lungs - so, 1) keep it away from children, and 2) be careful breathing in while using it to vigorously clean makeup from your face! Keep in mind, triple-distilled, purified products are supposedly the better alternative which is supposed to mean no toxic contaminants on your skin - some of which are potentially carcinogenic. Yes, this is devastating news because petroleum jelly is so very helpful on so many levels - including healing small wounds.

But, listen, this reminder is all about paying attention to what you allow into your home. Be conscious. Avoid running something to the till just because it is popular or pretty. Remember, for years cigarettes were actually advertised as "good for you!"  


SO NOW WHAT? The solution boils down to, if it is not edible it's likely best to avoid it.  Even then you have to know what products work best with YOU and your sensitivities.

Suggestions for Cleaning are three simple grocery store possibilities: Vinegar, Baking soda, Water. A combination of all three or either one with water can clean your house as well as your hair!

Apple Cider Vinegar, for example, with water can make a great cleanser for your hair - maybe even help to make it grow. Mmmm hm! 50/50 or adjusted to what suits you... the liquid of boiled onion with garlic once a month can not only diminish grey hair, it too can help hair grow then leave hair looking rich and healthy:
1 to 2 cups of water,
1 medium onion - skin and all!
2 garlic cloves.
Boil, let cool,
massage into hair, cover head and sit with it for an hour and you are good to go... remember to clean your splashes right away in case it stains your area.


Throw a lemon on some sprinkled baking soda, and your sink can look and smell glorious!

A dab of honey can leave lips feeling healed and tingling... add grape seed oil and/or beeswax to aid with that sticky feeling allowing for more slip. 

You don't need many hours scrubbing or making your own products. Experiment. Learn what works for you. Sometimes, that one product off the shelf will make life easier. Just be conscious as you decide if having that potential toxin in your home is worth it..

Give Thanks...
And DONE!

You

Have you noticed, the word "your" comprises the word "our?"

Do you think this marsupial-ism exists for a reason? 

 

Many are the occasions when your is our or yours is ours. But, do we take the opportunity to see them?

 

History is an integral example of such an instance. If we choose to see, history shows us that the more we attempt to reject, neglect, and destroy one people - separate them from others - separate them from ourselves, the more we usher in other people as foes, allies, saviours, and or accidental encounters. If we look to history it is clear, these connections cannot be avoided. Like a building without walls, we as a species, cannot stand without each other. This interconnectedness is as undisputed as the blood that courses through all family members, generation after generation - regardless the distance between each family member.

History demonstrates that we are a co-existing, co-dependant, serendipitous, enmeshment of a species. Humanity survived and excelled because of, as well as in spite of, opposing determinations - a wish that we were otherwiseWe have been cooperating, advancing, fighting, laughing, crying, eating, invading, loving, hating, lusting, killing, and birthing each other, likely, since the beginning of our existence. Yet, we continue to strain against the ties that bind us. We manage with each generation - maybe due to the overlap of the previous generations - devastating blows against each other. But, who best to teach us other than family?

Knowing your history is relevant as knowledge about the past allows an understanding of the ancestors, an understanding of their abilities as well as their errors which aids in your development and growth; development and growth being the reason for gaining understanding.

 

Most have been denied a complete origin story for so long, the desire to reclaim that which was (history) is crucial to moving forward. Like wanting to complete an unfinished puzzle, grabbing every piece found to complete the story (no matter how small that piece may be) seems crucial. Indeed, even the tiniest bit can expand the story. The secret is ensuring that searching for pieces, the accumulation of stories does not become the focus distracting from the original desire of developing and growing.

 

Truths found, Truth Finding, can be exhilarating, exciting and thrilling. These adjectives are positive emotions elevating an individual's sense of self. This feeling can be addictive: the racing of the heart, the quickening of the pulse, the thumping in the brain that feels like it is, literally, expanding (which it is in a way as new information causes new connections to be created between neurons). This seeking, this learning, this elevated feeling is addictive because dopamine neurons are activated by new stimuli. Dopamine surges to the brain to make it pay attention (to the new information). This attention, this alertness, can quickly and easily become the focus, leaving the original desire for growth forgotten. Sometimes the dopamine addiction can even feel like growth.  

The secret is to remember the reason for wanting to gain information, for wanting/needing to rebuild history. Once the purpose of the quest is in mind, ensuring that the information discovered actually aids in achieving growth is paramount. For, along with the euphoria of gaining insight there exists the challenge of sifting through the deluge of emotions that will accompany your personal journey through history. Knowledge can be a heavy burden as you walk in the steps of those before you. Their pain and suffering can be overwhelming, particularly as its relationship to your present becomes clear. Paralyzation is logical under the weight of all that empathy - particularly when accompanied by a determination to right wrongs

 

The challenge is resisting the heavy burden of knowledge and its emotional quagmire. Resisting the lure of accepting someone else's feelings, beliefs, or intent as your own will help. 

 

Gaining understanding without obstructing development is key. You gain by avoiding the traps of taking on your people's suffering enough to step beyond the negative emotions that surface with the information. This is when understanding our connectedness can be of service. While knowing your history aids in development and growth, knowing your friends', neighbours' and strangers' histories - knowing their stories and seeing the parallels with your own -could allow four points of understandingno people have lived without suffering; no people are exempt from the hardships of hurt; all people have participated in wickedness, and there is zero possibility of righting the wrongs of evil. Everything is everything to everyone.

Accepting this reality could also result in grief or disillusionment - a lack of faith in humanity. Instead of resolving that there is no hope for "us," it is important to decide that hardship will not be your identity. Hardship is not our identity. History has proven the incredibleness of us. (Y)Our achievements are remarkable. (Y)Our strides are evidence of who we can be if we so decide.

Bearing in mind that knowing the past is not the only way to growth. It is not crucial to know where you came from in order to know where you are going. 

 

Maya Angelou said, "honour others, and you have honoured yourself... people are watching; take the responsibility to teach."

Sidney Poitais said, "Avoid the scoreboard of life and live by the values that inspire you."  

 

Maybe all we need to know is what inspires us, and to tap into it, helping others to see and strive for their own ingenuity.

 

"It is natural to feel fear when your position is threatened...stay in your lane, and focus on your end goal." Ade Hassan.

Escape

Dreaming of a vacation get away? How about someplace you probably haven't thought? 

African Bush Camp.
Founded by a professional safari guide who was working in Zimbabwe, Beks Ndlovu set out to offer guests the flexibility of venturing and exploring the wonders of the African wilderness in different ways. Beks' sustainable camps have minimal impact on the environment, offering his guides a place where they could be creative and imaginative. The first of almost twenty, Somalisa Camp is an award-winning camp bringing guides together to teach guests about Africa. They have locations in Zimbabwe, Botswana and  Zambia.

Africanbushcamp.png
SomalisaCamp.png
Screen Shot 2022-10-10 at 12.01.32 AM.png
africanbushcamps.png
africanbushcamps.png
Ebony Wine and Spirits.png

Need we say more?
 

OK. How about this...

2017

CURRENT RELEASE

Fusion Red

Sourced from Napa Valley combines exceptional hand harvested fruit from the region. 2017, had relatively mild summer, followed by a extended fall sunshine created near-ideal conditions for our fruit.

On the nose shows off bright red fruit and floral notes layered with spice and a touch of oak. The wine washes over the palate with plum, red cherry along with a lift of blackberry and earthiness.

  • Alcohol 12.00%

https://ebonywineandspirits.com/#

Previous Issues
Want the link? Let us Know

QBMMom'sBirthdayMayEdition
QBMFeb'22PayingHomageCOVER
QBMCMAS'21Cover
QBMAutumn2021Cover
QBMFeb21EditionCover
QBMMay2021cover
QBMSept2020F/W
QBM Summer Entrepreneur Edition 2019
QBMss2020
QBMFW2019cover
QBM Spring 2019
QBM SS 2018
February Anniversary Edition 2018
QBM FW 2018
Christmas Edition 2017
QBM Summer 2017
QBM Winter 2016
QBM Summer Edition 2016
QBM Spring 2016
QBM December 2015
QBM Second Edition June 2015
QBM Premier Edition 2015
LoveYou.png